When Nothing’s Working - Transformation Power

What Real Transformation Actually Takes

I remember a time in my life when I felt completely stuck.

I was doing all the “right” things—journaling my prayers, soaking in every sermon and podcast I could find, worshiping in my living room, dancing before the Lord. And in those moments, I really did feel peace. I felt connected. I felt close to God.

A solitary figure stands in the rain, illuminated from behind, symbolizing the feeling of being close yet distant from a higher presence.

But as soon as I had to go about my actual life—parenting, working, dealing with people—I was right back in the same chaos.

Frustrated. Snappy. Exhausted. Resentful.

I'd think:

How can I feel so spiritual and still be so miserable?

So I’d go right back to the cycle. Another journal. Another sermon. Another cry session in worship. And I’d feel better… for a moment.

But life didn’t actually change.

I thought I was transforming.

But I was only coping—spiritually.

It took me a long time to realize: I was confusing peaceful moments with a renewed mind.

I thought the feeling of relief was healing. I thought God’s presence in the middle of my pain meant I was changing.

But the truth was—I hadn’t surrendered my patterns. I hadn’t examined my beliefs. I hadn’t invited the Holy Spirit into the places I still wanted control over—like how I thought about people, how I responded to conflict, or how I processed fear.

I didn’t want to change. I wanted to feel better.

So my soul stayed busy, even when my heart felt full.

I was surviving on spiritual input—but starving for actual transformation.

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When Proximity Isn’t Surrender

And I’m not the only one.

In Matthew 19, the rich young ruler came running to Jesus. He asked all the right questions, said all the right things. He wanted eternal life. But when Jesus said, “Let go of what’s ruling you”—he couldn’t do it.

He had emotion. He had effort. He even had a moment with Jesus Himself.

But he walked away… unchanged.

Because transformation doesn’t come from being near the presence of God. It comes from surrendering to it.

The Rich Young Ruler – Matthew 19:16–22

What happened: He sought Jesus out. He asked the right question: “What must I do to have eternal life?” He claimed to follow the commandments. But when Jesus invited him to release what ruled his heart (his wealth), he walked away sad.

Key truth: He encountered Jesus… but didn’t follow Him.He had proximity, sincerity, and spiritual curiosity—but no transformation, because he wouldn’t surrender.

Result: He left unchanged. Still rich, still respected… and still empty.

Like my journaling and worshiping, he was doing the right things. But Jesus didn’t want more behavior—He wanted full access. And when surrender wasn’t offered, transformation couldn’t happen.

Saul Before Becoming Paul – Acts 9

What happened: Saul was immersed in spiritual “input.” He was zealous, knowledgeable in Scripture, passionate about honoring God—in his mind. But he was completely off-course.

Key truth: God had to literally blind him to get his attention. Only when Saul stopped doing for God and started receiving from God was he transformed.

Result: The same man who was breathing threats became a man who carried healing. But not until he surrendered everything—status, beliefs, pride, and plans.

I may have been “doing all the things,” just like Saul. But the breakthrough came not through doing more—but by being undone.

David’s Broken Offering – Psalm 51

What happened: David had sinned greatly. He committed adultery, orchestrated a murder, and tried to cover it all up. When the prophet Nathan confronted him, David didn’t try to explain. He didn’t put on spiritual performance. He broke.

Key truth: In his darkest moment, David didn’t just say sorry. He handed God everything—his guilt, his fear, his anger at himself, his hope that maybe… God would still be near.

“You do not delight in sacrifice, or I would bring it; you do not take pleasure in burnt offerings. The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart, O God, you will not despise.”—Psalm 51:16–17

Result: God didn’t reject David. He restored him.Not because David did the right things—but because he finally offered the one thing God truly wanted: his heart.

That was the shift I had to make too. God wasn’t asking for more worship songs or journals. He wanted my heart. My pain. My fear. My hope. My anger. All of it.

Because true transformation doesn’t come from performance. It comes when we let Him have everything we’ve been trying to manage on our own.

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Reflection & Key Takeaways

If you’re in a season where you feel like you’re doing all the right things—reading the Word, listening to sermons, journaling, crying out in worship—but life still feels stuck, I want you to know this: you’re not crazy, and you’re not alone.

It’s entirely possible to be spiritually busy and emotionally worn out. To feel God's presence in a moment, but not see it reflected in your actual life.

That was me. And what I had to learn—what I believe God might be trying to show you now—is that proximity is not the same as surrender.

Real transformation doesn’t come from more effort. It comes from letting God into the places we’ve tried to manage, fix, or even protect. It comes from inviting Him into the mess—not just our intentions.

We see it in the life of David. He didn’t win God’s heart through perfection; he gave God his pain, his fear, his anger, his guilt, his hope. He said, “Here I am. Do what only You can do.” And that’s what God still wants today. Not more performance. Not more spiritual checklists. Just your heart.

A Prayer for When You’re Ready to Surrender

Father,

I don’t want to just feel better—I want to be made new.

I’ve been trying so hard to manage my pain, my thoughts, and my reactions… but I see now that You’re not asking me to fix it all.

You’re asking for my heart.

So here it is—my fears, my anger, my disappointments, my hopes.

The patterns I haven’t wanted to examine. The places I’ve resisted Your voice.

I don’t just want relief anymore.

I want to be transformed.

Come into every room of my heart—not just the ones I’ve cleaned up.

Reshape how I think. Realign what I believe.

Teach me how to walk in step with You—not just in my quiet moments, but in the everyday rhythms of life.

I trust You with the process.

And I give You permission to begin.

In Jesus’ name,

Amen.

If This Blog Stirred Something in You…

Then don’t stop here.

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You were never meant to stay stuck.

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